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read up to: Chapter 11 — Strings Attached this suffers from a severe case of LN syndrome. I noticed a large quantity of structrual flaws. I can go over some of them but you will need to do your own research and compare your writing to other sources and introspect. 1. floating dialogues. this...

I'd recommend reading more traditional novels and destructuring their chapters. What is the purpose of the paragraph? What is the point of this scene? whats the oversll purpose of the whole chapter? what are arcs? then try to write your own without ai assitance. think of a start, middle, and...

you dont need to read shakespeare for this. just regular novels that are also entertaining.

no i mean paperback novels

I can recommend you some published novels if thats somrthing youre interested in

she's cooked

its normal especially if you dont see it reflected in stats. some valdiation early on is healthy. i remember k5 randomly giving new stories 5 start when they appear on latest series and one of them was mine. its not bad

wait i read that wrong. I thought you had 1 unreleased chapter. ye you can post its fine. not much traffic anyway. this is the least busy review thread ive had.

chapter reviews are usually just editing sessions but i can take a look anyway. you can post it here or gdocs or whatever works for you just dont require a signup for me to read

when building villians, authors usually leave a human side to them no matter how small. you've done it too at times but in others you twist in unnecessarily. for example when she hugs her brother, the very next sentence is her grinning because she manipulated him. the very easy solution her is...

then do it why bother

read up to: [RE] Chapter 14 : Hospital are psychopathic girls the trend these days? its becoming a pattern. writing is decent. good execution of LN that doesnt feel too sloppy. characters are alright? I dislike both the mc and his sister. secondary characters are all the same to me, meaning...

ye i meany using the colors from the fire. darkest shade

what happens if you make his eye color as a similar shade as the fire

i dont consider reviews reading. i like to read stuff i enjoy

no ill check it out

its alright i can claim both

ive never roasted anyone's writing. I am a beacon of goodwill