New Author Love Feedback

[TaroMasayuki]

Hello!
I'm a new author here, and I’d really appreciate some feedback on my story.

Best Friend To Girlfriend? Denied!

The chapters is already published, and I’d love to fix any issues or improve it further.

• Is the opening engaging enough?
• Are there any awkward or unnatural phrases?
• Do the dialogues flow well?

Thank you in advance!

 

[L_Foxfire]

Review Swap Request

Hi there! I'd love to do a swap with you if you're open to reading a completed short story.

I have a completed short horror/thriller story (12 chapters / ~25k words). It's a blend of SCP-style clinical dread and cosmic body horror.

Here is the link: [https://www.scribblehub.com/series/2257911/containment-object-the-gallery-of-flesh/]

If you're interested in swapping for 12 chapters, let me know! I can start reading your work today and leave a detailed, honest review.

Let me know if we have a deal!

Best,
L. Foxfire

 

[Eldoria]

Loli...
Genben..
Marry?!

@FBI-Sama Please come here!

 

[AliceMoonvale]

Same, you lost me at loli.

 

[eagle_360]

Psychological drama

Huh?

Same, you lost me at loli.

Same, you lost me at loli.

 

[TheKillingAlice]

Same, you lost me at loli.

Same, you lost me at loli.

Same, you lost me at loli.

Review Swap Request

Hi there! I'd love to do a swap with you if you're open to reading a completed short story.

I have a completed short horror/thriller story (12 chapters / ~25k words). It's a blend of SCP-style clinical dread and cosmic body horror.

Here is the link: [https://www.scribblehub.com/series/2257911/containment-object-the-gallery-of-flesh/]

If you're interested in swapping for 12 chapters, let me know! I can start reading your work today and leave a detailed, honest review.

Let me know if we have a deal!

Best,
L. Foxfire

You don't give up, huh? Fighting!