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I think it's not bad. I liked the first chapter where Morgan is acting snobby the most. The idea of the children learning about the truth of the legendary heroes has potential. The uncle refusing to tell them about the silver eyes demon builds interest for the reader. You did a good job of...

Thank you, I appreciate the feedback, PrinceWijaya. That was a great explanation. I think your criticisms are exactly what I needed to hear.

Hey everyone! I've been learning as I go with my first story 'Psychic Tyrant.' It's been really fun working on it, but I feel like it has a lot of room for improvement. I've made a lot of changes to the first few chapters to try to make them more interesting for new readers, but I find it kind...