Writing Prompt Short story with the words "banana", "dual-wielding" and "manager"

[mostlyharmfulll]

I wonder what shorties you can come up with that include this three words.

 

[Mihou]

No minimum word count so here.

Spoiler: Ehem

"I am the dual-wielding banana manager, who sells all the banana you need, you shall fear me!" I said as I held two bananas on both my left and right hand while staring at the banana in front of me.

"Come at me, mortal!" the banana said while laughing as anger rushed up to my head.

"Just you watch!" I screamed while running towards the banana before my whole world flipped upside down.

I wonder what is up inside my 3 a.m brain... That is the most stupid story I wrote, is it even a story?

 

[ZoeStorm]

Hammered this out in a few minutes, off the top of my head.

Spoiler: Let's try this

It was supposed to be a simple job: in and out.

After several weeks of research, we'd managed to find out that the grocery store was a front for the Gnome Mafia: they would launder money by giving the bills and coins from robberies as change, and they were using the back room for their dirty dealings. And we happened to hear there was a safe in there.

We'd planned it carefully: we would move in at the very end of the day, when the store was almost empty; my partners in crime would make everyone lie on the floor, while I would get the manager, bring them to the back room, and force them to open the safe. Like I said, simple job: in and out, in a few minutes. The store was even on the outskirts of town, so we would be gone long before the City Battlemages could respond.

What we didn't count on, however, was that an off-duty newbie Battlemage, who was doing her grocery shopping after her shift, would decide to try and be a hero.

I still remember her, leaping to her feet, dual-wielding spells, a shield in one hand and a stunning hex in the other.

There was only a slight problem, though: stunning hexes are notoriously hard to get right, especially if one tries to make them with just one hand. And they're remarkably similar to explosion spells.

She flung the spell at me, and I dodged.

And the spell hit the produce sector.

So here I was, riding a bus home, after splitting up from my friends, ditching my soiled clothes, and cleaning myself up as best as I could.

The Gnomes were sure to move their hideout after tonight. Weeks of research and preparation, wasted.

And I really needed a shower.

"Mommy, why does that man smell like banana?"

"Shh! Don't point, dear, it's not polite."

...I've had better days.

 

[Nahrenne]

I wonder what shorties you can come up with that include this three words.

One day, my manager entered the office while dual-wielding two bananas. At first, I thought he was off his rockers with alcohol until I remembered our company had organised a banana cowboy event. "Ah...why'd I have to join such an enterprise?" I thought as I saw more of my co-workers enter wearing similar outfits with big smiles on their faces and making, 'pew-pew,' sounds with their bananas. "Well, at least it's not as bad as the shark-wrestling event." I thought as I lamented over being unsuitably dressed while continuing with my programming.

X

 

[mostlyharmfulll]

No minimum word count so here.

Spoiler: Ehem

"I am the dual-wielding banana manager, who sells all the banana you need, you shall fear me!" I said as I held two bananas on both my left and right hand while staring at the banana in front of me.

"Come at me, mortal!" the banana said while laughing as anger rushed up to my head.

"Just you watch!" I screamed while running towards the banana before my whole world flipped upside down.

I wonder what is up inside my 3 a.m brain... That is the most stupid story I wrote, is it even a story?

I would say yes, but it ends on a horrible cliffhanger. Are you planning a sequel?

 

[BenJepheneT]

Manager dual-wielding bananas

 

[Discount_Blade]

Pretty sure there is a beautiful porn-flick waiting to be born with those words.

 

[Bluebery]

Tsk, I know what you guys are thinking with those words. Ok then, I will do it and take all the shame:

---

I opened my eyes, found myself in a dark room. I tried to move...

Eh? I can't? Wait... why are my hands being tied up? What's happening?

Some one then turned on the light.

A fat, ugly man.

Wait... isn't he... my manager!?

"Yo, can I join too?" another ugly man entered the room and spoke.

"Of course!" the manager said.

They then looked at me with thirsty eyes.

Ten minutes later, I found myself choking, as my mouth were dual-wielding two bananas.

 

[HMiruko]

Eh, I did my best.

Spoiler: The Unfortunate Dream

You'd think being summoned into a new world is something great. Hey, all those novels, manga, and anime made it sound so amazing and fun. But just wait until some monkey god takes a liking to you and gives you a supposed "blessing". Blessing my ass! It's the worst curse in the history of curses!

It started like this. I was a kindhearted, handsome, young dude reading random novels in Scribblehub. I recently got hooked to another series and just couldn't get it out of my head. I went to the convenience store with my heads in the cloud. Out of nowhere, Truck-kun appeared. At this point, you should know what happened next.

The next thing I knew, someone was standing next to me. Equipped with my vast knowledge of isekai, I obviously got excited. When my vision cleared, the figure turned out to be some monkey. At first I laughed at myself thinking it was a beautiful goddess. That was until it spoke.

"Welcome, Manager," it said.

Yeah, I know. I also don't know what my parents were thinking.

Just like any sane normal being, I freaked out and screamed. Fortunately that didn't offend the monkey. He then explained about the world and how I was needed in this world called Apiery. Being the summoned hero, I was supposedly given a lot of perks. Of course, that included an awesome system, great stats, and skills. The monkey let me choose my class. Like a badass, I chose Dual-wielder. After all, who in their right minds wouldn't want to be like a badass dual-wielding ninja, right?

The monkey obliged, but... He was the one who decided on my weapon. It told me that I was unexpectedly handsome, so a reward is due. The monkey gave me two unbreakable weapons. But since these weapons are basically overpowered, I couldn't discard it ever. I also couldn't wield other weapons as long as I am wielding these weapons. You've guessed it right. That stupidass monkey gave me two unbreakable bananas as weapons!

Thus, the start of my mission to get rid of these bananas and kill that damn monkey.

 

[Sabruness]

eh, lets have a crack for shits and giggles.

Spoiler: bananabanana

I couldn't believe what i was seeing. A man, dressed in a banana costume, had just charged into the store and began threatening us with the bananas that he was dual-wielding. Only... i must be exhausted because i swear i saw an illusion of the banana man shooting at the manager with his bananas except i could see the blood coming from his body. The banana man then began moonwalking while singing the minion's banana song in perfect tune...... before i woke up screaming.

Phew, thank god it was only a nightmare. I really shouldnt eat so many bananas before bed.

 

[gaylolis]

There was a banana in my room, he's a dual-wielding warrior in a black jacket, his name was Kirito.

I was about to call the dorm manager, but he mentioned something about Sword Art Online.

"Wait a minute, why are you a banana?"

"Why not?"

It all started with an absurd death game by a psychopathic genius...