New writer from Italy, seeking feedback on my psychological detective story.

[BlackTom77]

my first work is called "Illusion-the deepest corner of the soul"
Genre: Mystery, Psychological, Detective Fiction

My story follows Detective Tom Shaw, a man haunted by a personal tragedy—the unsolved murder of his parents, a night he can't even remember. For years, he's been stuck, unable to move past his own grief and trauma.

For the moment it has only three chapter, obv the goal is to finish it. I think it can be a solid story (with also the details for the future) but it really needs feedbacks to improve and i will be greatful if you can help me with that. Thank you for your time and attention.

ILLUSION – The Deepest corner of the Soul

Detective Tom has no past, only a scar and a void in his memory. When the body of a little girl named Lina, the daughter of a friend, is found, Tom finds himself investigating a case that touches upon a trauma he's tried to forget his entire life. To find...

www.scribblehub.com

 

[Assurbanipal_II]

my first work is called "Illusion-the deepest corner of the soul"
Genre: Mystery, Psychological, Detective Fiction

My story follows Detective Tom Shaw, a man haunted by a personal tragedy—the unsolved murder of his parents, a night he can't even remember. For years, he's been stuck, unable to move past his own grief and trauma.

For the moment it has only three chapter, obv the goal is to finish it. I think it can be a solid story (with also the details for the future) but it really needs feedbacks to improve and i will be greatful if you can help me with that. Thank you for your time and attention.

ILLUSION – The Deepest corner of the Soul

Detective Tom has no past, only a scar and a void in his memory. When the body of a little girl named Lina, the daughter of a friend, is found, Tom finds himself investigating a case that touches upon a trauma he's tried to forget his entire life. To find...

www.scribblehub.com

Buondì~.

 

[Eldoria]

Detective story? My narrative protagonist is also a girl detective who prioritizes conscience in solving mysteries and crimes. But the story's main protagonist is a young mother and a bloody executioner greatly feared by corrupt nobles.

Blood Rose Princess Just Wants to Live in Peace with Her Little Daughter

What if the world chose to forget its saviour and its sins, while the saviour chose instead to protect her daughter’s innocence? Seven years ago, the age of tyranny was erased from the memory of mankind. Civilisation crumbled, the tyrants fell into an eternal sleep, and the victims woke...

www.scribblehub.com

 

[BlackTom77]

Detective story? My narrative protagonist is also a girl detective who prioritizes conscience in solving mysteries and crimes. But the story's main protagonist is a young mother and a bloody executioner greatly feared by corrupt nobles.

Blood Rose Princess Just Wants to Live in Peace with Her Little Daughter

What if the world chose to forget its saviour and its sins, while the saviour chose instead to protect her daughter’s innocence? Seven years ago, the age of tyranny was erased from the memory of mankind. Civilisation crumbled, the tyrants fell into an eternal sleep, and the victims woke...

www.scribblehub.com

That sounds really interesting. I've added it to my reading list and I'll definitely check it out. Thank you for the recommendation, though!

Buondì~.

oh Buongiorno . thank you for sharing your story, I'll be sure to check out your books ( which are huge ) when I get a chance. Thanks for stopping by my thread!

 

[Eldoria]

That sounds really interesting. I've added it to my reading list and I'll definitely check it out. Thank you for the recommendation, though!

You're welcome, I'll read your novel when I have free time. By the way, my novel is also still in the process of being perfected, reviewed, revised, and edited. I'm even rewriting Volume 1 while trying to finish Volume 2, which is approaching its climax, and preparing for Volume 3. What I want to say is, write first, revise later. Even a novel with good content doesn't necessarily mean readers will like it. We can only write as best as we can.

 

[Assurbanipal_II]

That sounds really interesting. I've added it to my reading list and I'll definitely check it out. Thank you for the recommendation, though!

oh Buongiorno . thank you for sharing your story, I'll be sure to check out your books ( which are huge ) when I get a chance. Thanks for stopping by my thread!

To be honest, i was just waving at you~. But if you read them, I would be delighted~.

 

[Sofiarettile]

I read the first chapeter and it already got my attention. it's super engaging from the very beggining. The mc is really complex and fascinating . i am really looking forward for new chapters