Writing How would readers take it if one of the MC's harem members is a non-virgin?

[ForestDweller]

So on the one hand I don't think anybody would have a problem with this? Virginity is a made up nonsense concept, sex work is work, go read The Ethical Slut by Easton & Hardy;

On the other hand the way you've asked this question and the language you used tell me you're the last person that should write this. The mere fact you're inherently framing the lady's past as a sex worker as "sad, broken, makes her a villain" (your words, not mine) is blaring like, all of the alarms that you've never even talked to a single sex worker in your entire life, which makes you severely underequipped to write about one.

So: reach out to a sex worker and ask them for some of their time as a sensitivity reader. And, if my feeling is right, prepare to have your mind be blown that sex does not, in fact, "damage" women. They're not goods you know, they're people.

EDIT: that's, of course, assuming you meant "whore her body around" as in was a sex worker. If you meant whore as in was a promiscuous lady, like... slut shaming in 2020, really?

Yeah, my story is a harem wish-fulfillment kind of story so I wouldn't bother trying to appease feminists. I mean, the girl would feel heavily guilty for that and would deem herself too impure for the MC, and even she becomes one of his wives, she would still carry a little of that guilt, manifesting as jealousy towards the other wives who keep their purity for the MC.

Now that's definitely triggering.

By casually imply, I mean more "mention it but don't put up a giant bulletin board of expositional info stating what should be extremely obvious if you know how to read and understand context." You know, like a girl casually complaining about something that one of her ex's did and not bring any more attention to it than that. That one thing alone tells readers that the girl used to be in a relationship. At that point, it's safe to assume that she's potentially done things with her ex. Now, you could have the protagonist be the type of guy who then asks his girlfriend about a bunch of details, wanting to know what she's done with him, and all that... but I'd rather not write a MC who I dislike for being one of those creepy guys obsessed with virginity who needs to know every detail of his girlfriend's prior relationships = P. The casual implication is much healthier for the relationship, less exposition-y than giving the reader every detail, and realistic for most relationships.

In my story, the girl would tell everything to the MC straight-up.

 

[Thor]

Yeah, my story is a harem wish-fulfillment kind of story so I wouldn't bother trying to appease feminists. I mean, the girl would feel heavily guilty for that and would deem herself too impure for the MC, and even she becomes one of his wives, she would still carry a little of that guilt, manifesting as jealousy towards the other wives who keep their purity for the MC.

Now that's definitely triggering.



In my story, the girl would tell everything to the MC straight-up.

To be honest, I wouldnt even start to read the story with characters who have that kind of mindset. Is there anything to be guilty about? I dont even know why virginity even falls under wish-fullfillment. Jp culture is sometimes just incomprehensible...

 

[Mejiro]

It's very much a cultural thing, with a dose of being a 'teenager' thing tbh - my characters tend to be twenties or thirties, where it's just presumed most, if not all, of them have had sex, because most people have, it's not that big a deal. Even in cultures that put more emphasis on it, there's a whole lot of unofficial sex going on, or various loopholes ("Anal/oral doesn't count" etc.) because people enjoy sex. There's also the general 'you're first time with your love is this beautiful moment of glory' as a trope/cliché, when, actually, it's more like a lot of awkward fumbling and an awkward (hopeful) climax, but then you get more experienced with each other and it gets better.

 

[ShyMaskedMan]

hmmm.. i as a person, reader and newbie writer, have a hard time accepting non-virgin girl/woman... given me myself is a virgin myself... its just the thought that someone u love n have a relationship now have ever experience sex with other man. Even though at that time, you haven't met her or know about her yet.

This is just my personal closed minded thought. I try to change but have a hard time to. I just can't accept it no matter how I twist n trick myself to.

Back to the point, if u want to write about non-virgin heroine, just be sure to have likes and dislikes from readers, each readers are different, you can't make all of them likes what u write. Just stick to the idea, plot and story line of what you wrote, write and gonna write after. Even woth good back story supporting the heroine, you will definitely be criticized about it as well as the MC.

Once again, I am just a newbie writer, and this is just my very personal thought. Thanks for the understanding and hope this can help u clear your doubts of what to write and how to write.

 

[ForestDweller]

Suddenly, I'm reminded of the Kannagi and Sacred Blacksmith debacle. Fans of the latter actually forced the author to release a revised version that made the antagonist impotent.

Funny thing is, I think The Sacred Blacksmith author is female and the series ends up being more similar to a shoujo than a shonen harem series.

What a shame. That series actually did a pretty decent job portraying a post-rape trauma recovery process.

 

[ShyMaskedMan]

Suddenly, I'm reminded of the Kannagi and Sacred Blacksmith debacle. Fans of the latter actually forced the author to release a revised version that made the antagonist impotent.

Funny thing is, I think The Sacred Blacksmith author is female and the series ends up being more similar to a shoujo than a shonen harem series.

What a shame. That series actually did a pretty decent job portraying a post-rape trauma recovery process.

well, those fans may have been just like me, hard to trick or twist our sense of value in relationships.

 

[Mejiro]

well, those fans may have been just like me, hard to trick or twist our sense of value in relationships.

In real-world terms, you better hope that your first partner is your _only_ partner, otherwise you're going to be sleeping with non-virgins - if you're starting a relationship with someone not a teenager, it's very good odds it won't be their first time, or yours (and, of course, if it's OK for you to have slept around but not them, that's fairly hypocritical).

 

[ShyMaskedMan]

In real-world terms, you better hope that your first partner is your _only_ partner, otherwise you're going to be sleeping with non-virgins - if you're starting a relationship with someone not a teenager, it's very good odds it won't be their first time, or yours (and, of course, if it's OK for you to have slept around but not them, that's fairly hypocritical).

I am a virgin, heck single n unwanted for the long years as my age. So is it normal that I can't accept if my love had relationship to sex level with her ex before right? I always thought it is not normal, and it makes my spirit at all time low every time I think about it.

 

[OliviaMyriad]

Eh. It's still hypocritical, like rules for thee but not for me.

 

[ShyMaskedMan]

Eh. It's still hypocritical, like rules for thee but not for me.

I just can't. Really. So don't mind me.
It is just my very personal sense of value and opinion. I am not trying to push it on to anyone.

 

[Mejiro]

It's also really, really limiting who you can date - the older you get, the less virgins of similar-ish age there's going to be, so unless you're going to date someone (a lot) younger, then it's going to get even harder. I personally prefer more experienced lovers as well - they know what they're doing a lot more, and it's nice to have at least one person involved that knows what to do! If that's what you want to do, then, hey, you do you, but it is going to present problems.

 

[LostinMovement]

I guess this whole debacle explains why I never felt compelled to write anything weeb-y like. Maybe because I'm female and not a teen but I just never saw the appeal. What does it matter if a love interest is not a virgin? Why even bother with the whole harem thing in the first place ? I just don't see how it would contribute to the plot or add anything to the story. Most harem works are wish-fulfillment piles of mess where the female love interests end up being irrelevant. I guess to each his own.

 

[AliceShiki]

I guess this whole debacle explains why I never felt compelled to write anything weeb-y like. Maybe because I'm female and not a teen but I just never saw the appeal. What does it matter if a love interest is not a virgin? Why even bother with the whole harem thing in the first place ? I just don't see how it would contribute to the plot or add anything to the story. Most harem works are wish-fulfillment piles of mess where the female love interests end up being irrelevant. I guess to each his own.

I think harems can be interesting if all characters are relevant, well-developed, have their own reasons to like the MC, have their own goals, and are interesting on their own.

It adds a new dimension to the story where you wonder with whom the MC will end up with and stuff and... Overall, it can be pretty nice when it's done like how Nejima did it.

... When it's just a bunch of boring trophies though? Then it sucks.

 

[Discount_Blade]

Dunno. I had a friend who married a woman whom had been prostituting herself since she was 15. He met her when she was 20 and she was a heroin addict as well by then. Dont know how he met her but in assuming it's obvious, he helped her get clean and not long after, she and he were both expecting their first child when she was 25. They've been married 15 years now and have 5 kids. Shes 40 or 41 now and expecting her 6th kid and they are so happy together i get jealous watching them. I mean they still hold hands and grin at eachother. They've lost none of their intimacy over the years.

So long story short, the prostitute plot device could be spun acceptably.