Pss, me have secret for u 
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this sprite bottol have funni serial number, 123678900, me think you like
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The stiches on my face are annoying me and I have no one to complain to.
Another thing my sister and I send to eachother periodically:
"Cock and ball torture"
"Why?"
"Ы"
I do not know who started it (me) but we still do it to this day.
I shaved
Every morning, depending on who wakes up first, my sister and I send each other the same messages. It's not "love you" or "good morning" It's something else:
"Has the suffering started?"
"Da."
@Nahrenne really got ya. Smitten much? LOL! (Teasing)
A reminder to call your loved ones.
How 99% of our conversation goes
I want to die like my grandfather did – peacefuly in my sleep, and not screaming in horror like the passengers on his plane.
I just realised that you are an ARM-y man.
?
??
???️??
??
?
Can't move. Emotion gone.
I wanted to play an online game. Almost threw my phone into the wall because of the bad Internet. It turns out that my mobile operator has broken something and now there is a bad connection in the whole country.
One more reason to start pumping iron.
Today has been a roller coaster ride for my emotions. So as soon as I am free, I - as a completely healthy person - will pump iron until my body refuses to move.
How to move a 300 kilogram safe?
Call people with professional equipment to move it for you? ?
Fold a cardboard box in half, put the safe on it and pull it with a rope? ?
If you thought I learned my lesson and started being more careful with my fingers... The answer is no.
Almost drilled through one of them on accident because I wasn't paying attention.
My cat almost gave me a heart attack. That asshole hid from everyone after I left and didn't show up for three days! It's not that unusual, but before that he was down with a severe food poisoning, so I was already beginning to think the worst.
Cats are assholes.
I love them.
I was cooking food and burned the ever living fuck out of my fingers.
Every letter I type comes with a prince of pain.
Ouch. -
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