Poly relationship

[Haku45]

I often come across poly art with my favorite characters. And they're pretty good. But always when I read about such relationships in real life. blech, they suck. I wish to make such relationships in my novel. Therefore, help me. And who has experience with writing such relationships or have you read such ones. Share them, and what tips are best to follow when writing such relationships in general.

 

[RepresentingWrath]

@K5Rakitan Can you help?

 

[LilRora]

Are you looking for a specific kind of relationship? PurpleCatGirl writes pretty good stories, primarily this one, though... well look through the genres and tags and decide for yourself whether that's something you're interested in.

Also We're Not So Different, You And I is an amazing story with a poly relationship. Same CWs apply.

If you're looking for something more male-oriented, then you'll have to turn to someone else cause I've never read those.

Edit: Actually, I don't have experience writing poly relationships, but I think what you'll want is not to focus too much on it. That may sound weird, but coming from the idea that three times the interactions (for just three people, and it's gonna grow fast for more) means three times the opportunities for drama you don't need.

I think, rather than trying to detail their relationships and feelings, you should focus much more on the surface and on the daily interactions. There will always be some drama behind the scenes, but jealousy or possessiveness realistically won't lead to any serious conflict in a poly relationship - or it will no longer be a poly relationship. Anyone entering a poly relationship wants to be there, so it's a given they won't flip out because of envy or something. If they don't want to be in such a relationship, or if they don't know it's one, it's an immediate red flag.

totally not me finishing this and realizing the same things apply to almost any other relationship

 

[greyblob]

But always when I read about such relationships in real life. blech, they suck.

almost as if it's a fictional concept

 

[Haku45]

almost as if it's a fictional concept

Someone's do. And it always one dude and few girls. And when they saying how they started it. it always starting with "hey babe, I. I mean we need make poly family". So yeah real life suck

Are you looking for a specific kind of relationship? PurpleCatGirl writes pretty good stories, primarily this one, though... well look through the genres and tags and decide for yourself whether that's something you're interested in.

Also We're Not So Different, You And I is an amazing story with a poly relationship. Same CWs apply.

If you're looking for something more male-oriented, then you'll have to turn to someone else cause I've never read those.

Edit: Actually, I don't have experience writing poly relationships, but I think what you'll want is not to focus too much on it. That may sound weird, but coming from the idea that three times the interactions (for just three people, and it's gonna grow fast for more) means three times the opportunities for drama you don't need.

I think, rather than trying to detail their relationships and feelings, you should focus much more on the surface and on the daily interactions. There will always be some drama behind the scenes, but jealousy or possessiveness realistically won't lead to any serious conflict in a poly relationship - or it will no longer be a poly relationship. Anyone entering a poly relationship wants to be there, so it's a given they won't flip out because of envy or something. If they don't want to be in such a relationship, or if they don't know it's one, it's an immediate red flag.

totally not me finishing this and realizing the same things apply to almost any other relationship

Thank you. I don't want to go into this too deeply. My story should be a comedy and not something too serious. But there must be drama, at least in some form. This helps with relationship dynamics. And it’s always nice to watch a couple calm down and admit their mistakes. Thanks again for the recommendations

 

[greyblob]

Someone's do. And it always one dude and few girls. And when they saying how they started it. it always starting with "hey babe, I. I mean we need make poly family". So yeah real life suck

the irl ones i have are the opposite actually. one woman convinces multiple guys. never works.

 

[Haku45]

the irl ones i have are the opposite actually. one woman convinces multiple guys. never works.

Guys should be gays. And then it's gonna work. (Or they gonna leave her, yep)

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Guys should be gays. And then it's gonna work. (Or they gonna leave her, yep)

If they are chad gays, why would they need a woman?

 

[Bartun]

I struggle with just one person, imagine handling several

 

[RepresentingCaution]

@K5Rakitan Can you help?

Too tired to help as much as I'd like to help, but I highly recommend IRL experience. OKCupid seems to be the best platform. Fetlife is also an option. There are smaller platforms for exclusively poly people, but there are so few people on those platforms that it's not worth it.

Polyamory often doesn't work out because most relationships, regardless of relationship structure, don't work out. When a monogamous couple breaks up, though, people don't go blaming monogamy. Keep in mind the cultural context of your novel.

Non-monogamy in other cultures:

longer video with more diverse relationship structures and some nudity

 

[RepresentingWrath]

Too tired to help as much as I'd like to help

Get some well deserved rest as soon as you can.

 

[Haku45]

Too tired to help as much as I'd like to help, but I highly recommend IRL experience. OKCupid seems to be the best platform. Fetlife is also an option. There are smaller platforms for exclusively poly people, but there are so few people on those platforms that it's not worth it.

Polyamory often doesn't work out because most relationships, regardless of relationship structure, don't work out. When a monogamous couple breaks up, though, people don't go blaming monogamy. Keep in mind the cultural context of your novel.

Non-monogamy in other cultures:

longer video with more diverse relationship structures and some nudity

Thanks. I probably not the first one who asked this, so yeah sorry

 

[Zagaroth]

So, my series has a central cast of an MFF thruple. it starts off as a marriage of convenience, though I acknowledge it was a bit of a rough start. I rushed it.

Anyway, despite that rough start I do what I think to be a pretty good job in developing the relationship, including making sure that the two women develop their leg of the relationship separately. I write using "fade-to-black", I'd rather write the build-up/flirting and the aftermath than the details in between.

So if you want to read mine to see in detail how I handle it, I of course welcome a new reader. But for specific advice: For a thruple, there are 4 relationships: Each pairing, and the three together. All four of these relationships need to be fully developed.

The number of relationships that need attention, both in character and as an author, increases rapidly as you add more people. Three is a good number to start with for a story, after that maybe consider more in a future story, rather than trying to tack new characters into your core relationship.

 

[Thraben]

Crudely, it depends on what you want the relationship to do for you in narrative.

If you want it to be a neat or cozy showcase of healthy relationship dynamics, start with a set or map of three pair dynamics. Establish firmly why each pair dynamic is viable and healthy (regardless of romance), then add the romantic stuff on top of the existing viable dynamic. Then, you can make a 4th dynamic in the map for the entire group as a whole.

If you want it to be thematically relevant, there isn't a hint or anything I can give you other than to do the same thing but this time have a 'thematic relevance' map.

If you want to be mean to your readers... I'm sure you don't need me help >:)