R. A. T. H. Feedback/Review

[LotsChrono]

Hello there, my story R. A. T. H has just wrapped up its first volume at chapter 64 and I’m looking for feedback on it (a review would be nice too.) Yup, the entire first volume as a whole, or however much you manage to get through.

[Synopsis]

Rose: a broken doll tossed out into the world with the carelessness befitting her status below humans. However, acquiring a power beyond what she should be able, she fights and Rose Against The Heavens.

The story of a homunculus fighting against fate with a piercing wrath. Raging, an adversary to a cruel world. From magecraft to guns. From jets to mechs. From swords to lasers. And robots to beasts. Her story takes place in a techno-fantasy running on mana.

[Link] https://www.scribblehub.com/series/195431/r-a-t-h/

 

[Freesia.Cutepearl]

It's very good! I've only gotten to 40 something but I absolutely say read it people!

When I finish it I can try to leave a review review, but erm, I feel like I'm not great at that.

 

[LotsChrono]

It's very good! I've only gotten to 40 something but I absolutely say read it people!

When I finish it I can try to leave a review review, but erm, I feel like I'm not great at that.

I’m glad you enjoy it~And trying is enough. I’m just trying to get a general sense for what people think of it as I start writing volume 2, though I’ve only finished one chapter of that so far.

 

[UYScuti]

Three hundred pages

I read the prologue up to chapter 4 the other day, umm... is that enough?

 

[LotsChrono]

Three hundred pages

I read the prologue up to chapter 4 the other day, umm... is that enough?

For feedback? Maybe. For a review? Nope.

 

[UYScuti]

For feedback? Maybe. For a review? Nope.

Overall I liked the premise, it’s well written. I thought the father was a bit overboard with that dinner scene. Chapter 3 is your inciting incident, so I can’t really talk much about the story afterwards since I didn’t get into it. Brother is clearly a deviant. The desert guy might be good, or might be quite the perv, only one chapter of him. Kinda sucks that she wasn’t quad-core, but you know, maybe she didn’t need all that processing power.

 

[LotsChrono]

Overall I liked the premise, it’s well written. I thought the father was a bit overboard with that dinner scene. Chapter 3 is your inciting incident, so I can’t really talk much about the story afterwards since I didn’t get into it. Brother is clearly a deviant. The desert guy might be good, or might be quite the perv, only one chapter of him. Kinda sucks that she wasn’t quad-core, but you know, maybe she didn’t need all that processing power.

Interesting interesting, thanks for the feedback. I should clarify that more cores doesn’t equal more processing power in homunculi, though, and that dual-cores are a fairly new invention in and of itself. There’s various reasons for that to be seen. Aside from that, thanks again, it’s nice to see how readers view different aspects of a story as opposed to the author.

 

[UYScuti]

I should clarify that more cores doesn’t equal more processing power in homunculi

Oh, I just kind of said it jokingly like dual core vs quad core pc’s. The core number wasn’t really meant in regards to the story. I guess I was the only one who found a little humor in that.

 

[LotsChrono]

Oh, I just kind of said it jokingly like dual core vs quad core pc’s. The core number wasn’t really meant in regards to the story. I guess I was the only one who found a little humor in that.

Ooooh, pft. No worries, I wouldn’t call myself a quick witted joke catcher anyhow. I get the joke now, though.