One-time Revision Swap [CLOSED]

[Lysander_Works]

I've completed another chapter of a WIP, and this time I would like some serious feedback on it. It's a very tough chapter to make, and I feel like it will certainly have more than one issue or another.
I am willing to swap a revision request of my 1 chapter for 1 chapter of someone else (2 if the word count is low). I also will not be ready to do it until probably Monday or Tuesday rolling around. Just thought I'd post it now to keep it ready.

Chapter in question (without spoilers): The chapter visits a small but emotional story (in summary's length) about two people who face very harsh backlash from their families after being caught kissing. It revolves around two girls, both come from a very tight christian background, and the time period is set a bit into the past, so that kind of thing was mostly seen as intolerable. The perspective however is told from neither of the two, rather from a third observer and her feelings after watching it all go down with no ability to step in and help. The observer then offers her updated (angry) views on the world at large (again, only during that time period).
> So, it will be a bit controversial. Anyone wanting to help me should know that it doesn't paint any religious view in a good light. Is that a trigger warning? IDK.

 

[FatElf]

Hey, I can help you the same way I'd help on my critique group. Depending on the size of your chapter I can do the same this weekend, if you share on a google docs or something, to make it easier to comment on things.

Edit: Removed the example image I had posted because, on further consideration its someone else work and I didn't really asked if I could share. Haha


Cheers.

 

[Lysander_Works]

Hey, I can help you the same way I'd help on my critique group. Depending on the size of your chapter I can do the same this weekend, if you share on a google docs or something, to make it easier to comment on things.

Edit: Removed the example image I had posted because, on further consideration its someone else work and I didn't really asked if I could share. Haha


Cheers.

Hello.

I am not too familiar with a critique group, but I should point out that having the chapter reach too many eyes too soon would defeat the purpose of me trying to do it directly. Also, I have decided long ago that I won't be using Google Docs for any of these chapters. I use word and can convert to other formats