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Hey everyone, I just wrote my first real sex scene for my first novel, and I don't really have any friends who will give me feedback on it. Can you guys let me know if this scene is done in a way that lets you imagine it and how well it flows from one beat to the next?

Hello to anyone who may pass by this. I am an amateur writer who decided to start because story crafting DND was too much fun for a weekly session. I've been on the readers' side of manga, web novels, and light novels for almost 10 years at this point. Due to the lack of any large mainstream...