So, I had a nightmarish day today. A test tube of acid exploded in my hands and my pants ripped and someone stole my practical file and I had to make a new one.
So, when I gave my first ever online exam, I saw there was a photo of this really dirty looking, 30-40ish old man's photo on my screen who looked like he hadn't taken a bath in a week and hadn't been to a barber for over an year. Plus, the way he had just let his beard grow made him look like a savage.
When I was 11, I read a joke an author once made in my history book. It read.
"Author's Date Of Birth: I really don't remember it since I was very small at that time, but my Mama says its 5th August."
I doubt others will share this feeling, but I find it really cute how simply scientists named their books. I like to imagine they spend days and days thinking of a title, and end up with something like "Animals" and when it comes to write a sequel, he was like, fuck it, I ain't doing that again and went with "Animals(revised)"
So, my father recieved some ultra boomer unfunny jokes and he really liked them, and was even excited to show them to me, which is really rare, considering how tsundere fathers can be. So, I thought of telling it here.
A cook says "I am a simple man but my food is special."
A shopkeeper says "Fans available here."
An astrologer says "pay me to know the spoiler"
Bishop 1: I must announce that our one true lord and saviour, Jesus has died.
Bishop 2: We must celebrate this day.
Bishop 1: Exactly- Wait, what? You mean mourn?
Bishop 2:I announce this to be a public holiday!
Bishop 1: Huh?
Bishop 3: Let's call it the Good Friday!
Bishop 2: Hell yeah!
So, I was making some tea right now when I noticed that my strainer was burnt. I was like, huh, that's weird. How did that happen. Then I proceeded to but the strainer on fire like I usually do while making tea, and suddenly it hits me,
Oooh, that's why.
Hey, my reaction score almost doubled in past few days. Remember Napelynn when we celebrated my 325th one?
Also, it is very creepy that I don't have to @ you to bring you here.
The first person to call a peacock' dance beautiful and a cuckoo' song sweet and a lion's mane majestic was the original furry.
Also the person who first drank animal milk.