I'll read your first chapter and tell you my opinion on it

harrydouthwaite

Well-known member
Joined
May 4, 2023
Messages
51
Points
58
Here is my story. Looking forward to hearing back from you.

 

Lorelliad

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 17, 2025
Messages
15
Points
48

Tony hasn't approved it yet, but it should show up. Tried it in incognito.

I was in a big slump for a while, and couldn't stick to a single story for more than a few chapters. It was about December of last year that I really started sticking to this. It's been working out for a while, and I haven't lost interest.
 

TheGreatOne6000

New member
Joined
Feb 4, 2026
Messages
7
Points
3
This is mine.


Inspired by A silent voice, Re zero, and slightly Classroom of the Elite. SInce it's not a fantasy but a slice of life, it was more inspired by Re zero's thematic depth and character writing.
 

treze

New member
Joined
Feb 17, 2026
Messages
5
Points
3
Would love some feedback on my Story.

All feedback is appreciated.

 

LiangQingge122

New member
Joined
Jan 14, 2026
Messages
4
Points
1
Looking forward to your opinion.

 

MC-Stories

The Wandering Dragon Storyteller
Joined
Dec 2, 2025
Messages
151
Points
43

I took your advice and fixed the writing Format with this one I hope you like this one better!
 

TooThunder7

New member
Joined
Feb 4, 2026
Messages
16
Points
3
Story ideas this guy Zack who 16 has super strength every fighting tournament he enter MMA,Boxing, etc he win he end alway accidentally killed his opponent in the first round he the campaign in all major fight tournament/event/sport.

Zack go to underground illegal fight rings where anything go and the fight are to the death where he can actually be challenged. He doesn’t feel bad about killing his opponent because they’re the wrost of the worst.

Zack does know how to fight and martial arts he can beat someone without his super strength.
 

Vulthur

New member
Joined
Mar 7, 2026
Messages
3
Points
1
Recently launched so worth a shot... what inspired me? Just a love of the genre and questions I wanted answers too I had not seen yet.
 

TimLionsdale

New member
Joined
Mar 7, 2026
Messages
1
Points
3
If you want to read m/m Romance i have a chapter you could read :)

There is not that much m/m romance in this chapter as its just setting up the main characters home life.
 

Cookiez_N_Potionz

Rank: Moon Leo
Joined
Sep 27, 2024
Messages
417
Points
78
The most important part of a web novel is the first chapter. It makes sense, really. On a place like scribblehub, where readers have millions of stories to choose from, it can be considered a privilige to even have them read your first chapter. This first chapter is usually where the reader decides whether they'll commit to the rest of the story or not. (I'd argue its the first few sentences even.) Some of you guys may be able to relate; but any time i try to write a story, the first chapter is always where i struggle the most.

After returning to writing (and scribblehub in general) after almost 3 years, i was thinking it'd be nice to get to know my fellow scribblehub authors a bit better. And what better way to do that than by reading you guys' stories? Now, I'll only be reading the first chapter (unless I'm super into the story), but hey, we've already established how important that first chapter is. I get quite busy, don't blame me...

What qualifies me to give you feedback? Absolutely nothing... Instead of looking at it as 'professional feedback', just think of it as a friends opinion of your stories :)

Fun bonus: Tell me what inspired you to write the story your working on! For me it was the Japan trip I just came back from with my best friend. I couldn't stop thinking about all the amazing things we did there, the wonderful people we met, the anxiety we had when we had to find our way through Shinjuku train station for the first time. My best friend and I keep talking about how it felt like a movie, so that's what inspired me to write my current story, i wanted to recapture how wonderful it can be to just get lost and adventure with someone you care about :blob_hug:

edit: pls no smut ;_;

Thank you for the awesome review of my Webnovel!

Hacking The System: Kingdom Of Stone
 

Sylver

Writer/Lover of Monster Girl Smut Content <3
Joined
Oct 11, 2023
Messages
564
Points
133

Nevafrost

A stupid and foolish daughter
Joined
Apr 5, 2024
Messages
834
Points
108
I'm here with my unpublished novel. :blob_uwu:

Fire. Screams.

'You shall perish in the deepest of hells!'

'These rat-bloods!'

'Disgrace to the magical society!'

Black mist. Everything went blank for some time.

'What's happening?'

Iris woke up with a start, sweating. The skin around where her pendant was touching burned. Another weird dream, she thought to herself. But soon she shook it off and went to wash up. It was a long day ahead.

Iris went to the dining hall in her regular corset to find everyone except for Harlin, who was obviously busy doing her makeup. Iris sat down beside Elina and nudged her with her elbow.
'I will ask Mother and Father now, okay?'
Eli nodded. Aylin looked at Iris from the other side of the dining table in a meaningful way and nodded.

'Mother, Father, are you aware that we are going on an expedition tomorrow?' Iris said. Queen Eleeza slightly frowned her eyebrows.

'I think not. Where are you going?'

'We are visiting Raczil to look at what the war has left behind.'

'I see you are interested in war, my dear,' King Franks said, his reddish eyes sparkling, 'I'm so proud of you.' Iris nodded and smiled. Harlin had entered the dining hall by then. She looked frantically at the others and bowed deeply, 'I apologize for delaying my arrival.' Elina mocked her, 'No need to be so polite, Late Queen. We know your makeup takes more time than your breakfast.'

'That's normal though.' They kept bickering.

After breakfast,

All four of them were walking down the hall towards their classroom.

'Don't you think they will find out?' asked Harlin, slightly frowning.

'Well, we gotta risk it, girl. We just have to act well enough for them not to find out,' said Elina, slowing down to match her pace.

'It's not just acting though. If Mr. Rupert tells Mrs. Eleejah, we are doomed. We have to make sure our plan works out,' Aylin said, looking kind of worried.
'Iris?' Aylin said as she pulled Iris by her arm, 'Is there anything on your mind?'

'Yes, you have been really silent,' Elina mocked her.

'Actually, yes. I had this weird dream this morning and I can't just forget what happened.'

'Haven’t you been having way too many nightmares lately?' Aylin looked worried.

'Did I tell you it was a nightmare?'

'I can tell. Now, tell us what you dreamt about.'

'It felt as if I had seen that dream before. Or, more like, I was there myself. It felt very realistic.'

'Was it the same thing you saw last time?'

'Nope. Last time, I couldn’t exactly remember what I saw; it was vague. But it was really clear this time. I saw that some people were being burnt in the city plaza. The crowd was chanting insults at them. And everything was covered in black mist. I felt as if I were present in that dream.'

'That's spooky. Maybe you should consult the psychologist,' Harlin suggested.

'Hey, I'm not going insane. I don’t need a psychologist.'

They arrived at their classroom. They walked into the classroom. Wind blew in through the floor to ceiling windows and the chirping of birds filled the air with a nice vibe.

There were not many students as usual. Well, it was normal because, of course, the princesses of four of the most powerful kingdoms wouldn’t sit in the same classroom as others. They attend special magic classes meant only for them. They learn how to hone their basic magic skills; for example, they learn to talk to birds, how to fly, and how to teleport. But all of them have a long way to go before they can become experts like their parents.

'Hey, Iris. Have you read that book yet?' asked Alison walking up to them.

'Yes, I have. It was so good. I loved the details about the war. It's interesting.'

'I knew you would love it,' Alison warmly smiled at her.

Eleena rolled her eyes, 'There he goes again with his sweet tongue.' Harleen smirked, 'Or are you jealous that he doesn’t use that sweet tongue while speaking to you?'

Elina cursed at her, 'I would rather have a dog lick me in the face than be jealous of him. Ew,' she crinkled her nose, 'I guess you should work a little harder on your makeup though.'

Harlin grinned as she sat at her desk, 'Even though I wouldn’t mind if he admires me, personally my standard is way too high.' Elina rolled her eyes. Irees continued her chatter with Alison as Ayleen sat between Elina and Harlin.

'Will you two stop your dogfighting?' Aylin said, brushing a strand of hair from her face.

'Oh, mother! Please forgive us for such rudeness. We shall never disappoint you again.' Elina said, mockingly pleading to Aylin. Aylin pursed her lips.
'I'm not your mother.'

'But you sure don't let me feel the absence of my mother.' Harlin burst out laughing. But just then Mr. Rupert entered the classroom.

'Okay, everyone, sit down. Mr. Alison, why are you standing at Ms. Iris's desk?' Alison hurried away.

'So, today we are going to learn about the history of the fall of the wizard kingdom.'
 

Lazytruly

New member
Joined
Mar 13, 2026
Messages
15
Points
3
The most important part of a web novel is the first chapter. It makes sense, really. On a place like scribblehub, where readers have millions of stories to choose from, it can be considered a privilige to even have them read your first chapter. This first chapter is usually where the reader decides whether they'll commit to the rest of the story or not. (I'd argue its the first few sentences even.) Some of you guys may be able to relate; but any time i try to write a story, the first chapter is always where i struggle the most.

After returning to writing (and scribblehub in general) after almost 3 years, i was thinking it'd be nice to get to know my fellow scribblehub authors a bit better. And what better way to do that than by reading you guys' stories? Now, I'll only be reading the first chapter (unless I'm super into the story), but hey, we've already established how important that first chapter is. I get quite busy, don't blame me...

What qualifies me to give you feedback? Absolutely nothing... Instead of looking at it as 'professional feedback', just think of it as a friends opinion of your stories :)

Fun bonus: Tell me what inspired you to write the story your working on! For me it was the Japan trip I just came back from with my best friend. I couldn't stop thinking about all the amazing things we did there, the wonderful people we met, the anxiety we had when we had to find our way through Shinjuku train station for the first time. My best friend and I keep talking about how it felt like a movie, so that's what inspired me to write my current story, i wanted to recapture how wonderful it can be to just get lost and adventure with someone you care about :blob_hug:

edit: pls no smut ;_;
You can try mine if you are interested its a fanfiction of demon slayer called demon slayer the jin-esis

Just really trying out writing so all sorta critisms are appreciated
 

Dani007

New member
Joined
Mar 9, 2026
Messages
13
Points
3
 

Talon88.1

Member
Joined
Oct 13, 2025
Messages
25
Points
13
Always looking for a critique to improve!
As for inspiration, it was literally just me brainstorming ideas and this one grabbed hold of my brain and refused to let go.
 
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