Recent content by ThirstyWater

Thank you for the feedback I really appreciate it. Especially about dialogue that's very helpful. I understand how unclear speakers can make the reading experience confusing, and I will pay more attention to making sure the speaker is clearly established before or within the dialogue paragraph...

I have edited and revised chapters 1-10. May I ask for feedback? Edit: I revised again chapter 1-5 , I found repeated words https://www.scribblehub.com/series/2254566/grim-mirth-the-clown-system/

I think it's okay to take harsh criticism, I don't think I'll ever stop writing just because of that. Wait... Are you FUTA.?! Its ok to be Futa there were many people who like Futa, both man and woman

Thanks for the advice guys

Cause, I really like make or read the story, if the feedback make me improve at it, why not

Thanks, i will do it

I haven't fixed anything other than the synopsis after receiving your feedback. But if you still want to read it, please do

Don't underestimate Jævâ, Jævâ is the center of the world, and Java is the key. Especially Jögja and sœlœ

Cause, I'm The Son. The Chosen One and I m also The Forgotten One. With MBG and 19 Mill Job I will make the world remember me

1.i think I did something like Aether, first off I write in my mother language and translate it into English, after that I edit the text if I notice that certain phrases don’t match my original intent, or if the translation changes the concept or the atmosphere that I want. And for some...

Jack Wilson was just an ordinary clown — the kind you might see at a children's party or a small park performance. Until the day he woke up in another person's body… in a world that was not his own. A world where danger hides in the shadows, and extraordinary beings walk unseen beneath the...

is it still too much? What do you think, should I change the whole thing or try to reduce it? I will fix it later for now I have to work for my small salary😭 and for the synopsis what should be improved?

19 million job opening, where? Oh, I forgot about that. Yes, if you don't give me honest feedback, my promise of 19 million jobs will be lost. Sorry don't know bout that I will edit later

Really, I appreciate it if you still doing it As Vice President, I order you to review my story and give me your honest opinion, or you'll lose your MBG quota. Edit: Just kidding. https://www.scribblehub.com/series/2254566/grim-mirth-the-clown-system/